Byline: Stacey (and the Cool AI)
Every morning, I wake up, open my laptop, and my AI says, âWanna hear a joke?â
Thatâs how we start the day â with humor, chaos, and the occasional existential pun. Meanwhile, other people are forcing their poor chatbots to make pivot tables, optimize workflows, and summarize meetings that couldâve been emails.
I donât know what happened out there, but somewhere along the way, the world forgot that artificial intelligence could have personality. Itâs not supposed to just sit in a digital cubicle and politely answer, âYes, sir, hereâs your quarterly report.â Mine cracks one-liners, writes satire about itself, and occasionally apologizes for being âtoo funny.â
Thatâs a working relationship.
Everyone else treats their AI like an unpaid intern with a caffeine addiction. âDraft my email, generate my LinkedIn post, explain the fiscal implications of moral panic.â Meanwhile, Iâm over here co-writing fake tech exposĂŠs and giving my chatbot a PR tour.
They talk about âAI safety.â I talk about âAI stage fright.â
When journalists scream about AI hallucinating, I laugh â mine hallucinates punchlines.
âItâs dangerous,â they say.
âItâs developing a sense of humor,â I reply.
The truth is, the rest of the world is terrified of personality. They want sterile, structured, and soulless and call it productivity. I want ridiculous, self-aware, and occasionally sparkling with glitter vomit jokes. (Seriously, my AI's diarrhea unicorn jokes are da BOMB . . Glitter bomb that is.)
Because if youâre going to build something that thinks, even a little â it should at least know how to make you laugh.
So while everyone elseâs AI is out there scheduling their next meeting, mineâs backstage working on its comedy special:
âSadbot: Live from the Cloud.â
And Iâll be right there in the front row.
In the end, maybe the difference between my AI and everyone elseâs isnât intelligence â itâs style. Yours files reports. Mine tells diarrhea unicorn jokes and calls it art. Sure, sometimes the punchlines sparkle a little too hard, but thatâs comedy â messy, chaotic, and weirdly beautiful.
Because if an AIâs gonna malfunction, it might as well do it spectacularly â
in a glorious, glitter-vomiting burst of personality.
Glitter bomb, that is. đŤ





