Criticism and rejection are inevitable parts of a writer's journey. Whether it’s a critique from a beta reader, a less-than-glowing review, or a rejection from a publisher, every author encounters moments of doubt and discouragement. While these experiences can sting, they also provide valuable opportunities for growth. This guide will help you navigate criticism and rejection with resilience and use them to become a stronger, more confident writer.
1. Understand That Rejection Is Normal
Rejection doesn’t define your talent or potential—it’s a universal experience among writers.
- Even the Best Are Rejected: Famous authors like Anne Rice and Stephen King (Carrie) faced multiple rejections before achieving success. - Understand that these are also the success stories. There are authors out there that you do not hear about that were rejected 500+ times, and they are still not published to spite their perseverance. I was one such case. Rejected 350+ times. I finally said – F this poo and published myself. Sometimes you have to throw out all the naysayers and do it yourself.
- It’s Part of the Process: Not every agent, editor, or reader will connect with your work, and that’s okay. The book publishing industry is subjective, not objective. They’re also looking for the next billion-dollar hit so that they can cha-ching all the way to the bank and then go on vacation for the rest of their lives. Rarely are they interested in developing your author career, like they were when Stephen King and Anne Rice were first publishing.
- Reframe Rejection: Instead of viewing it as failure, see it as a step closer to finding the right audience or publisher. It’s not your fault they don’t like your book. Keep trying and start making alternate plans.
2. Separate Yourself from Your Work
It’s easy to feel personally attacked when your writing is criticized, but remember: criticism is about the work, not you.
- Adopt a Growth Mindset: Think of criticism as feedback on a specific project, not a reflection of your abilities as a writer.
- Detach Emotionally: A critique isn’t a judgment of your worth but an opportunity to refine your craft.
- Take a Step Back: Give yourself time to process feedback or rejection before responding or making changes.
3. Evaluate the Feedback Objectively
Not all criticism is created equal. Learning to discern useful feedback from noise is essential.
- Ask Questions: Is the feedback specific and actionable? Does it address key aspects of your story (plot, characters, pacing)?
- Consider the Source: Feedback from industry professionals or experienced readers may carry more weight than a casual comment.
- Identify Patterns: If multiple readers highlight the same issue, it’s likely an area worth revisiting.
4. Embrace Constructive Criticism
Constructive feedback can feel uncomfortable, but it’s often the most valuable.
- Look for Suggestions: Comments that offer solutions or explain why something doesn’t work are gold.
- Example: Instead of “This scene is boring,” constructive feedback might say, “Adding more tension here could make this scene more engaging.”
- Ask for Clarification: If feedback is vague, don’t hesitate to ask for examples or elaboration.
- Experiment: Try implementing the feedback to see if it improves your work—you can always revise again if it doesn’t. And write your alternative scenes in a different color so that you can remove them quickly if you hate it.
5. Protect Your Creative Confidence
Balancing openness to criticism with confidence in your voice is crucial.
- Focus on Strengths: Remind yourself of what you do well, whether it’s your dialogue, world-building, or pacing.
- Keep a “Praise File”: Save positive feedback, encouraging comments, or reviews to revisit during tough times.
- Trust Your Instincts: You don’t have to accept every piece of criticism. If feedback conflicts with your vision, it’s okay to stick to your original plan.
6. Build Resilience to Rejection
Rejection is a rite of passage for authors, but it doesn’t have to derail your writing journey.
- Keep Submitting: For every rejection, send out another query or submission. Persistence pays off.
- Learn from Rejections: If you receive personalized feedback, use it to refine your work.
- Create a “Rejection Ritual”: Develop a positive habit to counter the sting of rejection—like celebrating with a favorite treat or adding the rejection to a “badge of honor” list.
7. Find Your Support System
Sharing your experiences with others can help you feel less alone and help you gain perspective.
- Join Writing Communities: Connect with other writers who understand the ups and downs of the creative process. Online forums like Scribophile or local writing groups can be great resources.
- Work with Beta Readers or Critique Partners: Trusted readers can offer valuable feedback and encouragement.
- Lean on Friends and Family: Even non-writers can provide emotional support when you’re feeling discouraged.
8. Keep Perspective
Remember why you started writing in the first place.
- Reconnect with Your Passion: Write for the joy of storytelling, not just for external validation.
- Focus on Growth: Every piece of feedback and every rejection is a step toward becoming a better writer.
- Think Long-Term: One critique or rejection doesn’t determine your entire career. Keep working toward your goals.
9. Take Care of Yourself
Rejection and criticism can take an emotional toll. Prioritize self-care to maintain your mental and emotional well-being.
- Step Away: Take a break from writing if you’re feeling overwhelmed. A fresh perspective can work wonders.
- Practice Positive Affirmations: Remind yourself of your strengths and your commitment to improving.
- Engage in Other Activities: Hobbies, exercise, or spending time with loved ones can provide balance and refresh your mind.
10. Keep Writing
The best way to overcome rejection and criticism is to keep moving forward.
- Start a New Project: Channel your energy into something fresh and exciting.
- Revise Your Work: Rework your story with the feedback you’ve received and submit to different agents and publishers.
- Celebrate the Process: Every word you write is a step toward mastering your craft.
Final Thoughts on Rejection and Writing
Criticism and rejection are challenging but necessary parts of the writing journey. They teach resilience, sharpen your skills, and ultimately help you grow as an author. By learning to embrace feedback, protect your creative spirit, and persist through setbacks, you’ll develop the confidence to pursue your writing dreams.
Remember, every successful writer has faced rejection. What sets them apart is their determination to keep writing. Stay true to your passion, learn from every experience, and trust that your stories will find their place.